Party Plane

How the hell are ya? Me? Yeah… whatever. I just got back from the Dry-Shitties, which were for once, actually nowhere near being dry. Wow – I don’t remember the last time the Tri-Cities has gotten that much rain in one week… ANYhooo…

So yeah – I just got back into town a few hours ago… I decided to fly to the Tri-Cities and back this time as I just was *not* in the mood for another crappy drive over the Pass. Granted, I have been on several harrowing trips over the Pass in my lifetime and many times have actually been the one driving. However, under the circumstances, I figured the less stress I was to experience this particular trip, the better. For the record, I am SO glad that I made that decision. I gotta say, though, it was a very wacky flight on the way over there… WOO!

First off, it’s only a 45min flight to the Tri-Cities. There’s not a lot of time to get used to the VERY small aircraft and that’s probably a good thing. There’s also not a lot of time to chit chat (which is GOOD) with other passengers OR to enjoy any tasty beverages. However, neither of these points were taken into consideration on this flight.

As I was getting situated in my seat, I was listening in on the passengers seated around me. There was quite a bit of Tri-Citiesesque chatter going on I have to admit I felt strangely a part of the scene. As I grew up in the area, I understood much of what was being discussed and why. ‘Lots of talk about Hanford, bits about farming, a little bit about local sports, etc. I’d also add that I understood how they were talking about the area. Yeah, the Tri-Cities is technically in Washington State – Nowhere NEAR the South – but sometimes you just wouldn’t know it. You may as well be in Texas from all the ‘y’alls’ and ‘ain’t nevers’…

When everyone was finally situated, the air of it being some sort of party flight really started to kick in. (Actually, what it really reminded me of was going on bus rides in high school over to neighboring cities for football games. With a bunch of rowdy, drunken jocks…) The first party contribution was made by one of the pilots as he came on over the intercom system.

“I’d like to welcome you to non-stop service from Seattle to Cabo San Lucas. The flight will be 18 hours. Your flight attendant will be coming by shortly with complimentary beverages. Please enjoy the flight and I hope you brought your sunscreen.”

This was then followed by various hoots and hollers from the passengers and then by giggling from the cockpit. Yeah, we were off to a rockin’ start. Then, the happy, drunken man sitting two seats in front of me started in on his routine.

“Heeeey – Who here is a Tri-Cities native?!”

Various people on the flight raised their hands and everyone became even closer than before. This was also followed with various hoots and hollers. Like we were at the county fair or something… I should also mention that many people on the flight actually recognized each other as they got on board the plane. “Hey Vern!” “Howdy, Charlie!” “Well, hey there, stranger!!” “Hey – how are ya, Betty?!” It was like a family reunion… Have I ever mentioned that the Tri-Cities isn’t exactly the biggest place on earth?

After the happy, drunken man further broke the ice, things started to get downright family-like. People were talking about their families, what schools their children went to, what kind of tractor their neighbors had, how big the new Wal-Mart was out on Road 68 – you name it. The happy, drunken man was shouting out to the cockpit, asking if they wanted him to drive and everyone was laughing and having a ding-dang good time. WOO! I, however, as much as I was strangely enjoying the scene, just wanted the flight to get in the air so I could get where I was going. Oh, and I wanted my freakin’ complimentary beverage service to begin. STAT.

When we got into the air, sure enough, the flight attendant started bustin’ out the drinks. People were joking with her that maybe the happy, drunken man should be carded and he kept joking that maybe he should be the one “driving” the plane. He also was chatting up the older ladies sitting behind him as well as comforting the nervous young woman sitting next to him. He was quite the playa. In a drunken, hillbilly sort of way….

Just as soon as the flight had started, it was already coming to an end. However, this didn’t stop the flight attendant from refreshing everyone’s drinks and stopping to share a joke with the happy, drunken man. Who, I might add, by this time had put his arm around the girl sitting next to him. The flight got quite bumpy towards the end and the happy, drunken man just felt she needed someone to keep her safe.

“I can honestly say this is the first flight I’ve ever been on where a stranger has put his arm around me.” She said as she nervously laughed with the happy, drunken man.

Ahhhh, the good times…

As we neared the Pasco airport, there were sighs and chuckles that we weren’t actually going to Cabo. We all put our trays in their upright position and readied ourselves for landing. It was just a 45min. flight, but by the time it was over, I felt like I had been flying with my family for hours. I felt at home with the passengers and their conversations and was happy to be landing in my hometown. I had to admit I had a very entertaining time. I also had to admit that, as much as the Tri-Cities tends to irritate me, it is indeed my home and these were indeed my peeps. Ahhh, welcome home.

But hey – now I’m REALLY back at home – in Seattle where I belong. Yeah, I love the Tri-Cities and it’s a great place to visit, but…

Oh, and the new Wal-Mart out on Road 68 really is quite big, indeed. Great.

Carry on!